Saturday, May 12, 2012

Sunday's Funny's For Mom's!

   Hello friends, Happy Mother's Day for all you mom's out there! To honor our special day I thought I'd bring you a few jokes about mom's! 

         My Mother Taught Me About...
1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION...
"Just wait until your father gets home."
2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING....
"You are going to get it when we get home!"
3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE...
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don't talk back to me!"
4. My Mother taught me LOGIC...
"If you fall out off that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE...
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD...
"If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job."
7. My Mother taught me HUMOR...
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
8. My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT...
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
9. My Mother taught me about GENETICS...
"You're just like your father."
10. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS...
"Do you think you were born in a barn?"
11. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE...
"When you get to be my age, you will understand."
And last but not least...
12. My Mother taught me about JUSTICE...
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you....Then you'll see what it's like!"
     You Know You've Turned Into a Mom When...

You automatically double-knot everything you tie. 
You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes. 
You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school! 
You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce. 
You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you. 
You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells. 
You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, "Mom, why don't you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?" 
You are out for a nice romantic meal with your husband, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you've reached over and started to cut up his steak!
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     If it's true that girls are inclined to marry men like their fathers, it is understandable why so many mothers cry so much at weddings!
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 Incontinence Hotline...Can you hold, please?
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Peace and Quiet Aunt Karen is the mother of two high-spirited young girls. When I called her one morning, our conversation was constantly interrupted by the din of kids screaming and chasing each other. “Could you hold on for a moment?” my aunt finally asked, putting down the phone.
Within ten seconds all I could hear was absolute silence. Then, “Okay, I’m back.”
“But it’s so quiet!” I exclaimed. “You must have complete control over those two.”
“Not really,” my aunt confessed wearily. “I’m in the closet.”
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Can you learn to read from a "Reading for Dummies" book?
Don't Ask!
I thought you were suppose to do this with a Tiger!
   I hope I made you smile, have a great Mother's Day! Until we meet again.......










4 comments:

Janice's footsteps said...

Thanks I did get a laugh from your post very creative have a great Sunday!

Susi aka Sinead said...

I think the first one is very sad. But the photos made me laugh, especially the one with the litter bin, lol. I love that sort of jokes:)
And I see that Blogger has got my RSS feeds right, both the updates and the titles! I'm amazed, lol! Have a wonderful day and a good Mother's day. Here it's not Mother's day until in 2 or 3 weeks.

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

happy mothers day...

Intricate Knot said...

LOL! My fav is "You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells."!!! Love your Sunday funnies, Natalie xo