Sunday, May 20, 2012

Sunday's Funny's

     Hello friends, hope your having a calm weekend! Or at least a fun one! Here's your jokes I hope they make you laugh!

Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you 3 wishes."
The woman freed the frog and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes-that whatever you wish for, your husband will get 10 times more or better!"
The woman said, "That would be okay," and for her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis, that women will flock to."
The woman replied, "That will be okay because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will only have eyes for me." So, KAZAM - she's the most beautiful woman in the world!
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you."
The woman said, "That will be okay because what is mine is his and what is his is mine." So, KAZAM she's the richest woman in the world!
The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, I'd like a mild heart attack.

Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I’ll bet you don't know what day this is."

"Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for the office.

At 10:00 a.m., the doorbell rang and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1:00 p.m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.
The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
"First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed. 
"I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!

A man and his wife were returning from a party one evening. As the couple was driving home, she asked her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?"
Totally flattered, he replied, "No, dear they haven't."
At that point she yelled, "Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?"


      You know it's hot outside when this happens!

 I have a question for all of you. Do you shop on the internet? And if you what do you shop for?

 Hope I made you smile! Until we meet again...


FoxyMoron said...

They're just keeping that dog in the fridge to eat later.
I buy perfume on the net, much cheaper than in stores and no snootty sales people, we also buy a lot of games online.
Lately I'm into wall stickers too.

Intricate Knot said...

I enjoyed all your Sunday Funnies, as always, Natalie. Sorry, I didn't drop by earlier. My fav is the Groundhog Day one! LOL

I shop on the internet all the time, although not much lately. I've bought books, music, drawing pens, paper, and the list goes on. I even bought my wedding shoes on the internet. I went to a dozen stores and couldn't find what I wanted, so I checked the internet and found the perfect pair!